go cycle, girl.

it happened a few hours ago now,. i ϑink some of my brain receptors have been fried b∵c ive only really been prætending to be upset about my bike being stolen. ϑereꝬ actually moreso a sense of relief ϑt overrides it - i had always been anticipating ϑs wůld happen after all. ϑere was ϑs idea ϑt i didn’t deserve such a nice bike, a bike ϑt retailed above £3500+, one whose target market was primarily cryptobros, s*ngaporeans, and yacht guys. for a fraction of ϑ’original price it was basically handed to me by one of ϑm, ϑy had left it iṋ ϑeir shed for more ϑan 5 years & assumed it nø longer worked. 1ᶜᵉ i fixed it up, ϑt ϑiŋg was worth more ϑan i was. itꝬ an unnerving feeling, to feel mogged by an inanimate object every time you walk iṋto ϑ’living room. it was just an incredible ϑiŋg., i loved it so much i never wanted to use it. & what a mortifying emotion.. i had plans,.. to cover it in mud, scrapes, duct tape, covers,.. i wanted to ruin it so it cůld be LIBERATED from its market value. it wůld just be mine. mine forever.. ⅋ut i realized ϑt wasn’t going to change anyϑiŋg. ϑereꝬ ϑs bike lock ϑt releases “vile fluid” when cut ϑrů, i ϑink maybe ϑt wůld have worked, or at least brought me some satisfaction to know ϑ’terrorists ϑt took ‘er from me had paid for it iṋ some way. ⅋ut i didn’t even own it for long enough for ϑ’lock to have been shipped to me. i guess I’m more so just impressed at how casually ϑy were able to do it while i was out for a lil 15min grocery run.

stolen gocycle g3 bike review: I’m left with a vague impression of a few, now, retrospectively, very-expensive-bike-rides. varying degrees of harmony i felt w/ it’s pedal assist, digital automatic gear change mechanism, & janky manual toggle. it wůld just decide, when to change gears and when the pedal assist wůld kick in like it knew better. ϑ’only ϑiŋg left for ϑ’user to do is to trust it. even ϑ’toggle, which you use to tell it to simply go, works iṋ mysterious ways. 1ˢᵗ of all, to get it to kick in, you still have to be pedalling, otherwise you see, it’d be too useful and ϑ’government has placed several very important safeguards to stop us from having nice ϑiŋgs. ϑs iꝬ fine & understandable, ⅋ut alϑo it imitates ϑ’design of a magnetic hall sensor w/ varying analogue power levels, it only goes on or off. when iṋ its on state, it infers from ϑ’desperation in your pedalling to feel out how much power to give. if youre stuck on a hill well ϑn you just must nøt want it enůgh!. thankfully we have ϑ’automatic gear changing to make ϑs easier. støp pedalling for half a second & ϑ’gear changes to one of 3, if ʯԙ nøt happy w/ its decision well too bad, try to change it to what you really want & it will undo it in 2 seconds tops. all of ϑs iꝬ to say, itꝬ smarter ϑan you so you shůld just listen. when it works itꝬ incredible. ϑereꝬ a threshold you can reach, when ʯԙ going at impressive speeds at ϑ’peak of its capacity, and it just feels smooth? or no, satisfying? like ʯԙ skimming ϑ’pavement, like a speedboat does on water. itꝬ beautiful. cars try to pass you, ⅋ut annoyingly ʯԙ going much faster ϑan ϑy knew was possible for such a little innocuous bicycle w/ tiny wheels. ϑy try anyway & you gain mana iṋ seeing ϑeir unrest (i am at war w/ every car on ϑ’road). itꝬ great.

ϑ’form itself iꝬ just ridiculous. itꝬ ϑ’kind of insane out of touch idea ϑt a naïve product design student wůld sketch up, completely divorced from ϑ’reality of material œconomy. “sure, the eco friendly solution to disposibles is to use clay instead?” ⅋ut it exists, it really exists. iꝬ it propertarianist art? theres a sense that if things were right in the world, it would not exist. “excess is excrement”, but ebay gives His toughest battles to His strongest Taoists.. and if i had ϑ’slightly newer model, i cůld have actually folded it up & taken it with me iṋto ϑ’store. b∵c folding ϑ’G3 requires you to take off ϑ’wheels, ʯԙ forced instead to screw ϑm on to støp barbarians from using ϑ’proprietary tool-less quick release wheel system to ϑeir advantage. ϑy sell ϑse special security screws ϑt require an obscure screwdriver w/ a hole in ϑ’middle to remove. still, you can just get ϑm off ϑ’aliexpress, & anyone w/ ϑ’right hardware in ϑeir boot can have whatever ϑy want. ϑ’security guard said ϑy have it on CCTV, ripping apart ϑ’lock like a paperclip. coppers please bring back my boy i know you got that brutality in you you just gotta lock in

completely scientific Yo La Tengo rating system - I Can Hear The Heart Beating As One out of And Nothing Turned Inside-Out.

grief rating - nothing compared to the loss i experience on a daily basis aha just kidding